LEARNING TO BE HAPPY

As I was doing my Bachelor in Psychology back in 2001-2004 I was drawn towards the positive Psychology philosophy and Professor Martin Seligman. I ended up doing my final research project within forgiveness, where I measured weather people who tend to forgive more have healthier mind and body.

Some researchers believe there is an “intelligence of well-being”, and that we can increase our overall level of happiness by consciously savoring pleasurable moments. I wonder: “Does it really boil down to that?” Is happiness actually a skill that can be practiced and honed like any other?

Other positive Psychology researchers describe happiness as “complete absorption in the activity and situation at hand”, a state of being at one with oneself and one´s surroundings, which is termed “flow”. Flow is best achieved when we immerse ourselves in our work or are involved in an athletic or creative activity for its own sake.

Perhaps more of us would feel more content with our lives more of the time if we weren´t saddled with unrealistic expectations fuelled by popular culture – from the fairytales read to us as children that end with “they lived happily ever after” to the books and films we take in as adults. “It´s not bad idea to lower the bar a bit”. If someone´s idea of happiness is to kick back in front of the TV with a beer in the evening, great!” The main thing is for us to get rid of the “brakes” in our head that keep us from being happy, and heighten our awareness for the little moments of bliss. If we can do that and stop to smell the roses once in a while, we might just be lucky enough to find something approaching the holy grail of “enduring happiness”.

“It is a mistake to think happiness is the goal” – old monk